Here’s a quick fic for you all today. It’s NSFW. Enjoy!
I have had SO MUCH to do this week and as a result I have had barely any time to write. There was no way I was letting this week come to an end without posting something. So; here you go, readers. It’s short and sweet and I hope you enjoy it. NSFW, as ever.
I got an email from someone asking why I always write happy endings for Sven and Mimi. Well, I thought ‘d share in case any of you are wondering, too.
1. The world is depressing enough as it is.
2. Why the fuck not? It’s fictional. It’s escapism. It’s not going to win the Booker Prize so calm the hell down. It’s just a bit of fun. If you want gritty realism go and read some Thomas Hardy.
3. Because we need to see more happy, healthy representations of BDSM dynamics where people negotiate and talk and laugh and live happily. I still feel that there aren’t enough characters who are kinky and more-or-less healthy. In many cases, the bad guy is into kinky or fetishistic sex not the heroes. Kinky sexuality is treated as a symptom of mental illness, abuse or shorthand for weird. I’m so tired of that. So, here; have some people who are just trying to live a quiet life and be happy who are also kinky. Isn’t that what most of us want?
4. Growing up, I never saw any media representations of kinky relationships, submissive men or dominant women that were not cliched, terrifying or the butt of a joke. If you can’t see it, it’s very hard to be okay with it never mind actually be it.
Safe and bound with love
submit to me and be free
to discover you.
Gah, I love these haiku. They’re beautiful. Fifi really catches “it”.
Here’s the next part of the fiction that I began ages ago. There’s going to be a third part but I realised it had been so long since I’d put anything new out I’d break this up into a few more parts. Part one is here if you need to refresh. Now things have calmed down a bit I hope to have part three up tomorrow or Saturday. NSFW. Enjoy.
1. We’re great about talking about how rough submissive men have it and while that’s true I wish there was more said about the fears of dominant women. I’m afraid I won’t be good enough, or harsh enough or tender enough. I’m worried I’ll be too greedy or not forward enough. I don’t want to hurt you but I do.
2. I’m heterosexual but I’m profoundly uncomfortable with the nice, passive, obliging narrative of heterosexual femininity. I have seen it imprison so many brilliant, vibrant women I know and love.
3. I generally identify as dominant but sometimes my own inclination towards sadism scares me. In it’s ferocity, in my total need for it and it’s underwear melting hotness.
4. I generally identify as dominant but sometimes I have submissive fantasies. They’re pretty hot, too.
5. I spent most of my adolescence being utterly terrified of my developing and fattening female body. I cut my hair short and wore boys’ clothes from when I was 11-17. It was only when I realised that there was this other, kinky way to define one’s sexual identity that I could embrace and appreciate my femininity as something that I alone owned.
6. Even though I struggle and it can be hard, I don’t regret this for a moment. I am, doubtlessly happier like this than I would be trying to adhere to a traditional, more conventional means of heterosexual dating dynamics.
7. I feel that this is my most authentic self. I feel sexier, stronger, happier identifying as a dominant woman and there is a special kind of calm that comes over me when I talk with other similarly minded kinky people. I feel safe in a way I never have before.
8. I love “vanilla” things: kissing, cuddles, tenderness, romance.
9. Sometimes, I feel lonely and worry I will not find a compatible partner. At other times, I am sure that it will happen. Usually, I’m somewhere between the two.
10. I’m awful at flirting but I’m very good at dirty talk so I figure it will be Okay In The End.
Here’s a teaser first part to a new serial I’m writing! SFW. As ever, Mimi is being stubborn, Sven hates it.
Unfortunately, Tumblr only hosts small audio posts.
Therefore, if you want the 10:00 minute recording of Hers I’ve done then you can email me at email@example.com and I’ll send it to you.
So, an Anon requested a pegging story. So; here it is.
That awkward moment when you realise we live in a world where Fifty Shades of Grey is wildly popular and yet, real discussion of the dynamics of BDSM relationships are deemed too outre by Wordpress and Blogger.
Growing up I felt like I didn’t really fit anywhere. I didn’t realise that there were other girls who felt the same. I was insular, self-absorbed and so were they; hiding behind too much eyeliner or loud music or horses or ballet or cigarettes or alcohol or comic books like hundreds of girls before us. We did not have the language or the education to know that we could speak out and admit this feeling of not-quite-being. We thought we were the only ones.
For a long time, I thought I might be gay though I knew that didn’t fit. I was heterosexual but was unhappy with the common narrative of heterosexual relationships. I didn’t want to be fought for, I didn’t want to be won. I’m a human being for God’s sake, not a prize at the hook-a-duck stand.
I know it’s scary but please don’t try to impress me. Just try to be yourself. Be kind. Be funny and thoughtful and conscientious. I will try to be the same and maybe, there might be a relationship in it. Maybe there won’t be. The point is, I’d rather come to that realisation by getting to know you for you, future love of mine, not the person you think I want but the person you actually are: The person who has bad days as well as good. The person who fails and triumphs. The person who wakes up with morning breath and has myriad other weird and potentially embarrassing habits.
Please don’t be one of those men who loses respect for a woman once you have slept with her or deifies her upon waking; Women who stand so high usually fall once they roll out of bed with yesterday’s makeup on the pillow and a boob clap.
Be polite and honest. Did you read that?
HONEST. Not in a “Your arse looks like the QE2.” way but in a don’t be a “nice guy” and passive aggressively be my friend just to try and date me way.
Don’t beat me, don’t blackmail me, don’t lie to me, don’t rape me, don’t steal from me, don’t intimidate me, don’t patronize me, don’t harm me in any intentional way just as I would for you.
Be vulnerable in front of me. Be human. Be flawed. Be embarrassed. Be sad.
Be good and kind and ask permission first. Even if I said yes last time doesn’t mean I’ll say yes this time. Maybe I’ll be tired or fractious or particularly into this documentary about volcanoes. Who knows? Just ask.
I’m human, just like you. Not a Goddess or a Princess or a Queen. I don’t have the energy to be your fantasy all the time. I have shit to do.
Know that sometimes, when I have the energy and inspiration I will be more than anything you could possibly imagine. I’m real, for a start. ;)
I realised a while back that many, many girls feel just the same. While there are girls who want to be treated like holy deities there are others who don’t. That doesn’t make us any less deserving of respect or care or general gentlemanliness it’s simply a different kind of care. Ask what we’d like. Tell us what you’d like. I’ll meet you in the middle.
We, all 3.5 billion of us, are different. Please take the time and care to understand and respect other people’s boundaries.